This is just an all around BAD idea

Why people insist on doing such stupid things is beyond me. If this was such a brilliant brain child...all merry go rounds would be powered by faggy yellow scooters.

note to retards.

they are not. this is an example of why this happens to be the case.



end of blog.

David.

Monopoly - Schmonopoly

A British version of the classic Monopoly board game released recently substitutes a Visa-imprinted debit card for the stacks of yellow, blue and purple play money.

"We started looking at what Monopoly would look like if we designed it today," said Chris Weatherhead, a Britain-based spokesperson for Hasbro, which makes the best-selling board game. "We noticed consumers are using debit cards, carrying around cash a lot less."

Whats next, the game comes with a midget that serves as the games landlord…
When you fail to pay your rent on time he cuts up your visa, takes your clothes as collateral and kicks you in the junk.

Remember the game OPERATION, are they going to modernize that game too. Im thinking, lets throw a carcus preserved in a jar with a pair of tongs, then all you have to do is carefully remove all the organs without hittin the metal surrounded orifice.

* buzzer sound *

- BIGMOUTH -

"6o seconds and counting...."

Lately I have been looking at the sky, particularly the stars and appreciating what life has to offer. Taking a single moment in time and framing it in my mind and critiqing its existence or admiring its beauty. Most of these moments occur when I’m driving my car, usually at night time when the moonlight shines bright, accompanied with a magical breeze that sweeps through the windows, whisking away my worries…then skipping them along the shoreline like flat rocks.

I think one of the tricks to enjoying life more, is slowing it down... take the moments and embracing it with all of yourself. Don't rush through it - don't think about what you have to do later on that day - just "be" - Look at how the grass blows, watch the ants run through the swaying skyscrapers of green, maybe even take a second to wave back at the trees… or simply look for shapes in the clouds.

In fact, take 1 full minute right now and think about absolutely nothing... just enjoy the moment. 60 seconds can feel like forever, we sometimes forget how precious such a small amount of time can be.

Do it – truly relax and feel the calm throughout your body.

Time is the difference between being on a bus or watching it pass by - winning or losing - a chance to tell someone how much you love them - a chance to say goodbye - a minute is an eternity when you realize that you have no more minutes to spare - 60 seconds is most definitely sacred.

I can think about a lot of things I would trade for another minute of time on this planet.
But remember, you can’t buy time.

Therefore…

Appreciate the importance of your life - and what it means to have all the time in the world... don't waste it on deadlines, stress and sadnesses. Definitely don't waste it taking it for granted. Above all - don't let it pass you by because:

" Life isn’t something you can finish last minute...."

- BLAH -

My week was very BLAH! I arrived late to work a few times and finished up yet another move... now im looking forward to NOT having to work the weekend. If i choose i can finish work tonight and go straight to the hometown! Possibly catch a Baseball game, definately hang out with some friends and spend some time with my doggy and take my mother out for dinner :D

My weight loss continues to see progress, im down to 196. Thats the lowest i have weighed in lord knows how long. I dunno if i can keep a healthy 19o even though thats my goal, time will tell. For now im just happy to see the progress!

Im going to try and get another blog off during the weekend.

David

Tard at Timmies

So im back in my hometown for the weekend and decide that I will treat myself to a medium double double @ my favorite Tim Hortons location. I order my coffee, YummY... in fact, there was a tad bit of pre ejaculate in my shorts as I later found out due to the anticipation of my lips gently pressing up against the cup which posseses the oh so sweet nector of the GODS, the beverage well all know and love, the one...the only, the joyful java bean...COFFEE!

But thats not what this blog is about. I also ordered a can of soda, sprite in fact. Guess what this kid did while bringing the pop the counter. The lil mother fucker shook it! My eyes kinda popped outta my skull for a lil bit, i know this because i could feel a mild breeze creep into my exposed eye sockets while he made his way back to me. I immediately looked at his nametag, to be quite honest, I was expecting to see "in training" or something on his name tag. Which still wouldnt be much of an excuse, just common sense would tell you DONT SHAKE THE CAN OF SODA BEFORE I HAND IT OVER TO THE CUSTOMER... well, he was lacking that common sense. Then I thought his nametag should have said "FUCKTARD" more so, thinking that it should have been his given name.

I asked the dude why would you shake my can of pop before you handed it over to me...its going to explode. He shook his head and said, "no" then gave me a sassy smile. I almost pulled out my pecker and slapped him across the face with it. That lil smug ass smile, see how big that grin is when i have my nuts crammed in your mouth LoL.

Point of blog : None

but it made for a good release.

BIG MOUTH

This is some funny shiat...

David Chapelle is one funny dude. I dont usually post video or anything like that... but this is definately a good time killer, about 10 minutes in length. Its a good view :D Enjoy!

Update on my new life

The title really cuts down the clutter. I guess I will just talk a lil about whats going on recently. I am going to be moving again, not anywhere far...just to another house. The new place WILL have Hi Speed, Yeeeeee fu@king Haaaaaa! My weight loss is going well and im already fitting a lil more snug in my pants :) 2 more weeks of this and i should be well on my way... Im trying to play Badminton on a regular basis as well, a game that i loved in high school and played at a pretty high level with some club players back in the day. 10 pounds should be gone by the end of the next 2 weeks!

My car was recently all fixed up, but it came back with lots of imperfections so it had to go back into the shop, only to come out with the prior imperfections fixed and new imperfections to be fixed up LoL. I told the dude to just give me the bottle of polish and i'll take care of the rest! The entire experience left me wanting to treat myself for not flying off the handle about the whole situation, so i'm going to be buying a new deck and subs for the vehicle :)

The pay for my new job is decent even tho im having a hard time holding onto it. Im eating out a lot (but eating well, remember...my diet) and on top of that, i'm cooking every evening...which means, im buying a lot of food. wreckless spending on my part, so i'm going to start buying MORE groceries and prepare my work lunches.

Work continues to be amazing, im enjoying my new life but of course...miss all of my friends that visit this site, and of course, my mom. Mommy, even though u dont read this blog, I love you and I miss you very much. It just makes me feel better writing it down and hearing it in my head, imagining that shes right here in front of me where i can give her a big hug and kiss :D

the mushy side of BIG MOUTH.

David.

Miracle whip and me...

Just kiddng LoL.

Not too much to report of as of late other than the fact that im back to eating right and going to the gym regularly. Funny what a week of living the proper lifestyle can do for you. Im falling asleep much easier, that and im much more regular ( ewwwwwwwwwies ) and best of all, my pants are fitting a lil better and I get full when eating smaller portions then usual.

Im drinking tea instead of coffee. Instead of cream and sugar, im taking milk and sweetner. All that and I havent had any soda pop in a while either.

My goal is to lose 10 pounds in 2 weeks. I want to do it healthy, i know that might take a lil more time, but theres no damage in setting intense goals LoL. If it takes me 3 weeks to a month to get it done...ill still be pleased.

til next time FATTIES LoL.

BIG MOUTH.

I did it, I finally did it...

I remember sometime during my blogging talking about running outside in the rain as an adult, or the lack there of. I also mentioned that the next time i was to see it storming outside, i would run out there like i did when i was a child. Jumping around in puddles and prancing around like a lil girl LoL.

Well thats exactly what i did, and wanna know something...it was fu@king awesome. It made me feel like a kid again. I just ran around my work parking lot in the middle of one of my shows. I ran around for about 5 minutes, smiling, jumping around and laughing. There had to be about 10 people in the building that were watching at the door or taking a glance through the windows, they were all smiling as well. It was intoxicating to watch i guess...

I couldnt help it but smile the whole time i was doing it. I was laughing, yucking it up with the people watching and enjoying every second of it. Funny that when it usually rains, youre so concerned with getting wet, that and usually the rain is cold... TRUTH IS - its not that cold and getting wet isnt THAT big of a deal...

How it became so TABOO is beyond me. So im thinking to myself, im going to start doing a few more things from childhood that i havent done for awhile. Maybe go on the monkey bars or swingset, who knows... But if you have the chance to run out in a storm, do it... u wont regret it, I had the time of my life :D

I still havent gotten to the miracle whip masturbation, but when i DO... i'll take picutres and let ya know about it.

BIG MOUTH

This ones for the Yanks

HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY....

even though I don't really know what it's all about LoL.

(Hey, I'm Canadian)

...and I don't wanna hear any YANKEES getting on my case about it either because the truth is that roughly 75% of Amercians think Canadians live in Igloos and the number one mode of transporation is dog sled or canoe. In fact, I bet most don't even know what a fu@king igloo looks like more or less what its made of, but what they do know is that we apparently live in one LoL.

All joking aside tho, its just a dame shame that all the troops overseas (whether it be for the fourth of July or Canada Day on the first of July) can't be home with their families and friends.

Take a second out of your day when youre partying it up and remember how fortunate we are to be doing so when there are young /old / brave men and women putting their lives on the line for their country.

God Bless

David.